Love, Hysteria, Influencers and Mass Shootings: 379 Days of COVID
In this article I discuss the trajectory of the COVID19 pandemic in the United States and how I’ve been personally affected.
Thursday March 12, 2020 I left my office mid-afternoon as my body overwhelmed with fatigue in a way it never had. I couldn’t concentrate. I could barely drive. Chills took over. That Sunday, a nonchalant and dismissive physician ordered my fourteen-day quarantine as she telephonically diagnosed me with “anything but COVID.” On what medical basis I’m not sure. By this time we knew people could be asymptomatic, so the scientific foundation of her conclusion is unclear. I exhibited every symptom but the ominous cough, which arrived days later.
A second diagnosis confirmed that I needed all medication available to me, including an inhaler, to mitigate my symptoms and prevent their exacerbation at all costs. Less than one week later, California enacted a state-wide lockdown and the rest of the United States soon followed. For weeks, I couldn’t open windows without my body temperature increasing and entering into a coughing fit. A year onward, my exercise breathing never returned to its pre-“upper-respiratory infection” levels. My immunocompromisation manifests in hay fever symptoms when I’m exposed to any other human.
In the beginning only elected officials and those on the brink of death were brought in for testing. The virus was novel and we didn’t have the resources. An insurance defense attorney living in West Los Angeles was not a priority. I never returned to work.
As chaos enveloped around us America was transformed in ways I hoped I’d never see, and in others I’m thankful I did. The disorder surrounding supplies reached its fever pitch with toilet paper. An armed police officer monitored the paper goods in my West Los Angeles Target. The line was over one hundred feet long. Store shelves were bare. Mass graves opened in New York City. A Norwegian university implored its students to return from countries lacking health and transportation infrastructure, like the United States. At 549,000 deaths and counting- it wasn’t hyperbole.
Our global facade eroded as people began to see the United States for what it is: not a wealthy country, but a country with extraordinarily wealthy people in it. There’s a difference. As my English friend Lianne exclaimed, “I’ve always said America is a developing country with an excellent marketing strategy.”
Does the United States have less problems than other countries? Absolutely. We also have problems we unequivocally shouldn’t. A recent report found that one-third of COVID deaths and 40% of infections were linked to lack of insurance. You can’t call yourself the “leader of the free world” and the “best country on earth” and not provide your citizens with healthcare. America’s addiction to inequality and discrimination, be it for class, gender, or race, is a profound neurosis that should be studied on both a micro and macro level.
The months continued with the lynching of Ahmud Abrey; Amy Cooper’s weaponizing tears; Breonna Taylor’s execution; and strangulation of George Floyd. It was the last death that lit the spark to galvanize the globe. Black people aren’t even safe from police brutality during a pandemic. The impenetrability of White Supremacy reached its peak during the insurrection on January 6, where armed gunmen stormed the Capitol hoping to kidnap and murder members of the United States Congress. They almost succeeded. Adding insult to their intractable injury, thousands of these terrorists walked off the Capitol grounds unapprehended and even assisted by law enforcement. Six months prior, Black Lives Matter i.e. civil rights protesters, were gassed, beaten, and executed.
Reaching a semblance of familiarity, in the last weeks American returned to the violence it knows so well. During the height of the pandemic, many of us remarked at the lack of school shootings taking place, only to remember that it was the absence of a physical presence of children in schools to prevent them. When I began this article, the mass shooting referenced was the massacre in Georgia fueled by anti-Asian hate. As of now, there’s been another shooting in Boulder, Colorado — thirty minutes from the residence of my good friend. By next week, who knows. As eager as we are to return to the normal of December 2019, Americans need to ask ourselves what that means. Turns out we didn’t need an international respiratory virus; our enemies are from within.
In a brighter contrast, COVID19 brought extraordinary kindness, love, and strength. People in my apartment building left notes asking anyone who needed a run to the grocer or pharmacy to give them a call and they’d be happy to oblige. There were letter campaigns to care homes to alleviate the loneliness of the elderly. Singletons found love in the pandemic like never before — mainly because men had to return to courtship. My building manager offered to speak to my building owner to pay my rent, because I had been such a good tenant. As I’m writing this, a friend recently announced she’s engaged. And lest we be reminded of the COVID babies….who are making their auspicious debut, though not in the record numbers we thought. Where there is darkness, there is light.
By the same token, lockdown engendered a tsunami of creativity. If idle hands are the devil’s playground; lockdown progenerated creative genius. I didn’t promulgate the absurdity that we had to be productive during lockdown; I think we all needed to channel the Bee Gees and simply stay alive. But for those who can’t sit still, being stuck inside provided an ample opportunity to flourish. A positive of being confined to our homes was watching their content. Achieng, known as the Tantalizing Confidence Queen of Instagram changed my life for the better with her “Are We in Agreement” video. I’m not the only one. In October 2020 Achieng had less than 100,000 followers, and by the end of March 2021 she had 212,000 and rising. Until Elsa Majimbo, who knew watching cackle while eating chips could be so entertaining? I’m waiting for her Lay’s sponsorship deal. Valentino has arrived. Young, talented, and diverse influencers are the entertainers of our future — I’m here for it.
Today, we move forward with hope. A light at the end of what’s been the most dark and harrowing tunnel are the “I’m vaccinated” selfies littering my timeline. Almost to the point of tears, they fill me with pride. The prior administration was catastrophic and I have my grievances of the current, but America has reversed course and is once again becoming something of which to be proud. Our vaccine rollout is ahead of schedule, notwithstanding the mishaps evident of a system riddled with systemic racism and inequality. In California most adults can sign up for a vaccine by April 15, 2021. When we’re able to travel for leisure, my only “I’m vaccinated” selfie will be a self portrait at a topless beach.
In my best Kelly Taylor impression, March 2020 was “before everything.” Afterwards, I hope we learned something; though I fear not enough. I hope we change, of which our survival is contingent. I hope we evolve, but with the arrest and charge of Georgia State Representative Park Cannon, we continue to stint our growth.
One year ago today, I was to return to work. Instead, Los Angeles County administered fines to any nonessential onsite business operation. I never worked in my office again. Globally, I don’t think COVID19 will irreversibly dissipate until 2022. Before we reach that point, before another 379 days, I hope we heed the lessons of the 379 prior. For all our sakes.
